March 25, 2015

It's the Business End of the Season!

By Paul Johnson

So it’s now the international break, just when the ‘Business End’ of the season is hotting up UEFA decide it’s time to risk the fitness of all the best players and watch Lithuania. Off course we won’t really be able to watch Lithuania because England wont let its home games be televised.

Being the ‘business end’ of the season means there’s the Champions League to decide – will Messi, Ronaldo or Robben win it, or in other words – who cares because there’s no English teams left. Honestly it really is time UEFA stepped in and stopped this total unbalance of European sides. La Liga should just be a tournament of three teams, whilst there really is no point in running the Bundesliga, it should just be awarded to Bayern Munchen each year! It’s always nice to have at least one English team flying the flag (preferably our beloved Arsenal) if only to watch with the added tension of “Please may Chelski lose this one” or that feeling that English teams really are the best when Man U/Liverpool (or even Arsenal) used to make it to the Final each year!

Anyway I digress, it’s usually about now that we start looking at the Barclays Premier League and try and work out how it will finish. The BBC used to provide a handy ‘End of Season’ calculator but they haven’t done that for a few years so we’ll just have to do it the old fashioned way. Some rough math on the back of an old envelope.

We all know that Chelski are going to win the Barclays Premier League, so the real questions are; Can Arsenal finish better than the fourth place play off? Wouldn’t it be great if Man U failed to qualify for the Champions League again? How far down can Man Shitty be before their manager gets sacked? And will Liverpool Self implode thanks to an end of season screw up by Stevie G? Oh and most importantly – when will we be celebrating St Totteringhams day?

Before last weekend I really thought Liverpool were in with a chance, especially if they could have pulled off beating Man U at home. It would have been perfect for us Gooners since it would have opened up a three point gap between us and fourth place. Well it was not to have been thanks in the whole to Steve G’s 38 seconds of madness, I do believe he’s triggered the Liverpool end of season squidgies again, meaning they will miss out on Champions league footie next year - memories flash back to his little slip up last year that gave Chelski a 2-0 win just as Liverpool were coasting to the BPL title.

So here goes – here are my predictions for the results of the top seven clubs and how the end of season table will look: Believe me this took ages to put together so read carefully! Remember this is just for fun so don't blame me if it all goes belly up!

Saturday 4th April
Arsenal 3vs 1Liverpool
Everton 1vs 1Southampton
Man U 3vs 0Aston Villa
Chelsea 3vs 0Stoke

Sunday 5th April
Burnley 0vs 2Spurs

Monday 6th April
Crystal Palace 1vs 2Man City

Saturday 11th April
Southampton 1vs 0Hull
Spurs 2vs 0Aston Villa
Burnley 1vs 2Arsenal

Sunday 12 April
QPR 0vs 3Chelsea
Man U 3vs 2Man C

Monday 13th April
Liverpool 2vs 2Newcastle

Saturday 18th April
Hull 0vs 1Liverpool
Stoke 2vs 0Southampton
Chelsea 2vs 2Man U

Sunday 19th April
Man C 3vs 1West Ham
Newcastle 1vs 2Spurs

Saturday 25th April
Southampton 3vs 2Spurs
WBA 1vs 2Liverpool
Man C 4vs 0Aston Villa

Sunday 26th April
Everton 0vs 2Man U
Arsenal 2vs 2Chelsea
Wednesday 29th April
Leicester 0vs 3Chelsea

Saturday 2nd May
Chelsea 3vs 0Crystal Palace
Hull 0vs 2Arsenal
Liverpool 1vs 0QPR
Man U 3vs 0WBA
Sunderland 2vs 2Southampton
Spurs 2vs 2Man C

Saturday 9th May
Arsenal 3vs 0Swansea
Chelsea 2vs 1Liverpool
Crystal Palace 0vs 3Man U
Leicester 0vs 2Southampton
Man C 3vs 0QPR
Stoke 3vs 2Spurs

Saturday 16th May
Liverpool 2vs 0Crystal Palace
Man U 3vs 3Arsenal
Southampton 2vs 1Aston Villa
Swansea 0vs 2Man C
Spurs 3vs 1Hull
WBA 0vs 4Chelsea

Wednesday 20th May
Arsenal 2vs 1Sunderland

Sunday 24th May
Arsenal 1vs 0WBA
Chelsea 3vs 0Sunderland
Everton 2vs 2Spurs
Hull 0vs 2Man U
Man C 2vs 2Southampton
Stoke 2vs 2Liverpool

This means the final table will look like this:

So the end of season predictions are:

Arsenal will finish second for the first since 2004/05 season

Arsenal beat Liverpool in the FA Cup final 3-2 after extra time, Giroud scores a hattrick

Most importantly, St Totteringhams day on my predictions will be May 9th when Spurs lose to Stoke and Arsenal beat Swansea

Yes, with Liverpool having both Gerrard and now Skrtel red carded they will in fact self implode finishing up seventh.

Man City will Sack Pellegrini for finishing a lowly fourth place and having to qualify for Champions league footie next year.

Harry Kane signs for Real Madrid and declares he really is a gooner after all.

Oh and Watford get promoted - but that's a whole different story !!!

So Silverware to the Emirates this year?